Sight Unseen: May 6, 2005

Continuing the Friday series of reviews of movies I haven't seen.

House of Wax
Hey Paris, why the long face? This movie is the perfect project for you. With all the make-up you wear, you already look like you're made of wax. Paris Hilton--she's just not a pretty face.*


Kingdom of Heaven
What if the Kingdom of Heaven were really just a House of Wax? What if God was one of us?




*Why this animosity towards Ms. Hilton? For starters, she's trying to infringe on my use of the language by copyrighting the phrase, "That's hot", as if she came up with it. I had a friend in college who used that phrase all the time--long before Paris Hilton was a internet porn sensation. It was an annoying catchphrase then, and it's annoying now, but I'll be damned if someone should own the rights to its use. Do you want to pay Ms. Hilton a nickel every time you explain to children why they shouldn't put their tiny hands on the stove burner ("Don't touch, that's hot")? Me, neither.